Undeniably, I had onehelluvanawesometime in my stay in the University. Every year has been extraordinary. No doubt about it, UP gave me the best four years of my life. It has been such a great honor to be in a crowd like that, to be mentored by the best professors, to exchange ideas with tomorrow’s best men and women, and to be a scholar of the entire Filipino nation.
In UP I learned not just about life. I learned about what it means to lead a great one (and also how to!). I became classmates not just with bright people. Better still, I got to mingle with the country’s brightest. I may have “failed” at times in UP’s standards. But hey, those were UP’s standards. And though it may not seem true due to my previous statements (haha), UP humbled me and made me realize that you’re never really good enough… and it is not a matter of “you can always do better” but more of “you should always try to strive to be better.” After all, you owe it to the people. And it’s not even out of pagbabayad ng utang na loob because the people subsidized our tuition. More than anything else, it’s about good citizenship.
I miss UP already.
It’s a bit hard for me to move on given that there never was really any closure. But then again, why should there be a closure when you can still keep in touch? Closures are for endings. I may be an Atenean in a few months time, but I’ll always be UP. I’ll always have the blood of a UP graduate and not passing the LAE can’t take that away from me.
I can’t stress enough how I love UP and how I enjoyed my short stay. I comfort myself with the fact that I have maximized my stay by being so many things at the same time, without sacrificing my academics. I don’t know when I’ll ever be in such a great sea of bright minds again. Sure there’s Ateneo Law, but then we’d all be students of the law. The feeling of being among tomorrow’s leaders in just about every field is really different. Besides, Ateneo can never be UP. But then that’s a good thing, ‘cause then I’d be looking forward to brand new experiences, things I wouldn’t get if I’m still in UP :) For more academic (and personal) growth na rin, diba? (I hope my point is clear, as I do not mean to offend the former school in any way).
So Philippines, thank you for the honor of being an Iskolar ng Bayan for four splendid years. You know I love you :)
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Sunday, April 26, 2009
College grad
Thanks to these two very important people, I was able to go to school, get a college degree, and experience one helluvanawesomesupergreat 16 years of education!
In the past, I always cry during graduation. Well, I only really graduated twice before college, since I was accelerated from Kinder I to Grade 1. But well, today I didn't cry, and I'm quite surprised.Oh well. Inasmuch as I want to, I don't really have the time to think about my affects since we still have the University Graduation to attend tomorrow, so I need some good sleep.
Maybe I'll talk about grad in more detail after tomorrow. But please everyone, pray that it won't rain tomorrow. 'Cause there would be no ceremony if it rains in the afternoon.
I'm excited for tomorrow's medal :D Teehee. Two medals. Haha.
And by the way, the fact that Jamo was in the family dinner with us tonight was the cherry on top of the cake :)
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
On taking pictures
I don't know but for the past couple of months, a question has been ringing inside my head, a question closely related to my addiction to posting albums in my multiply account.
Am I going to events for the pictures that I can take? Or am I taking pictures merely to show off?
I mean, sometimes, I do feel a pang when I make taking pictures a motivation. I mean that's not innately bad, but sometimes it becomes the main reason, which doesn't sound right at all. Like, okay, I wanna go to this or that so I'll have something new to upload... And sometimes, I feel like I'm missing the event (even if I'm physically there) because I'm too busy taking pictures... Hmm, it makes sense now. Maybe that's why I enjoy looking at pictures from my camera and commenting on friends' albums in multiply... 'Cause sometimes (and sadly), that's when I truly get to live the moment, if you get what I mean.
But hey, then again I think that's such a negative picture I'm painting. Don't get me wrong. That's not the case all the time. Operational word from the last paragraph: sometimes.
I think I have this notion that the more pictures you have and the more detailed you get to document an event, the more fun it would seem when other people would view. My point? The focus becomes other people's opinions. And that shouldn't be the case. [Rhea]lization: when taking pictures, remember that what you want to document is genuine fun, not the trying-hard type meant primarily to make your life look more interesting.
A few pictures would do. Go where you want to go, and live the moment right then and there. People from ages ago had their memories to rely on when reliving events... and maybe theirs were richer, since they got to really live in the moment, every sweet second of it.
Am I going to events for the pictures that I can take? Or am I taking pictures merely to show off?
I mean, sometimes, I do feel a pang when I make taking pictures a motivation. I mean that's not innately bad, but sometimes it becomes the main reason, which doesn't sound right at all. Like, okay, I wanna go to this or that so I'll have something new to upload... And sometimes, I feel like I'm missing the event (even if I'm physically there) because I'm too busy taking pictures... Hmm, it makes sense now. Maybe that's why I enjoy looking at pictures from my camera and commenting on friends' albums in multiply... 'Cause sometimes (and sadly), that's when I truly get to live the moment, if you get what I mean.
But hey, then again I think that's such a negative picture I'm painting. Don't get me wrong. That's not the case all the time. Operational word from the last paragraph: sometimes.
I think I have this notion that the more pictures you have and the more detailed you get to document an event, the more fun it would seem when other people would view. My point? The focus becomes other people's opinions. And that shouldn't be the case. [Rhea]lization: when taking pictures, remember that what you want to document is genuine fun, not the trying-hard type meant primarily to make your life look more interesting.
A few pictures would do. Go where you want to go, and live the moment right then and there. People from ages ago had their memories to rely on when reliving events... and maybe theirs were richer, since they got to really live in the moment, every sweet second of it.
Monday, April 6, 2009
BYE BYE, LOVE :(
April 3, 2009
I was done with the stuff I had to do in UP by 2:15. So I left for the mall to shop while waiting for the Kappa Induction to be over so I could go with Joybee to the seniors' meeting place in Antipolo.
The very first thing I got for myself was this really nice, Greek-ish torquoise top. Chiffon fabric. I got it from my new favorite store, Mags (SM North Edsa Annex). They don't have any other branch in Luzon, but they do have branches in Visayas and Mindanao. Fair enough for me. I like stores that you don't find everywhere. But the best part is that they only sell one item per kind. A certain style may come in more than one color or more than one size (but most pieces usually don't have sizes). But once you have something in a certain size, style and color, you can be sure that nobody else can buy that from that branch. Hence, each piece is one of a kind. And the designs are pretty, too. That's why I super love that store. The fact that the stuff are really affordable is just a bonus!
So I went out of that store, happy with my first buy that afternoon. After that, I got a nice and simple purple top, a swim suit, and super short white shorts. (I transferred to Trinoma, by the way).
The Kappa Induction was still on-going, so I thought I have enough time to get myself a new pair of Havaianas. Or Dupe (which I think is a lot softer than Havs!). I headed to the All Flipflops outlet, hoping to use my 10% discount from my BDJ planner. Haha. But the ones I like don't come in my size, and the ones that do come in my size aren't comfortable or cute enough. So I went to Landmark instead. Still nothing.
It was already almost 6, and the ceremony was about to be over, so I decided to go back to UP. I then remembered I forgot to bring a bar of soap and that I haven't bought sunblock yet. But then I noticed something.
One paper bag less.
The first I got that day.
The one I liked the most.
I hurriedly went to the nearest cashier to pay for the sunblock and the soap. The lady was super slow and I almost volunteered to do the job for her. But I still have manners. Haha. Then I went back to the flipflops area in Landmark. To All Flipflops. To the stores I visited prior to going to All Flipflops. None. Nada. Zilch.
I went to the concierge and asked if they have a Lost and Found Section. The lady told me that they do. I then filled up a form and she reported it over the phone. She told me they'd just contact me if someone returns it.
It has been three days already. Nobody did.
And also because of that, I got really delayed and ended up taking a cab from Trinoma to Sta. Lucia. Goodbye P200. Since I hate being the cause of the delay, I told the seniors they could go ahead to the resort and I'll just take a cab all the way there. But they love me, so they waited :) Thank God the traffic wasn't that heavy.
The top itself cost a few bucks less than 600, so it's not really a big deal. The thing is that I cannot buy the same thing from that store again, since it doesn't come in sizes, and the only other color they have for that style is dark brown, which isn't as summery as torquoise. And there's no other stock. They only produce one of each kind, remember? The one I got was actually what the mannequin was wearing. She was half-naked when I left.
You know how much I love clothes. I know this is somewhat petty, but just imagine that you lost something you really like and you can relate to me.
Goodbye, love :'(
Good thing I had fun with the seniors that night :) And on the brighter side, at least it wasn't the paper bag containing my new bikini set that got lost/stolen. I would've had nothing to wear that night if that was what I lost.
***Since I used my credit card, and I put my copy of the receipt inside the paper bag, it has my name in it. HAYY MAGUILTY NA ANG HINDI NAGBALIK :( Tntry ko na lang isiping poor person ang nakakuha non at kailangang kailangan niya ng ganon for something. Hayy.
***For being careless (and wasting my parents' money), I punished myself by deleting one item from my list of things to buy (yes, though dad gave me my conscience as my limit--basically, unlimited--I'm still a good girl and I gave myself a quantity quota per kind) and by deducting a certain amount from the limit I set for the corporate clothes.
I was done with the stuff I had to do in UP by 2:15. So I left for the mall to shop while waiting for the Kappa Induction to be over so I could go with Joybee to the seniors' meeting place in Antipolo.
The very first thing I got for myself was this really nice, Greek-ish torquoise top. Chiffon fabric. I got it from my new favorite store, Mags (SM North Edsa Annex). They don't have any other branch in Luzon, but they do have branches in Visayas and Mindanao. Fair enough for me. I like stores that you don't find everywhere. But the best part is that they only sell one item per kind. A certain style may come in more than one color or more than one size (but most pieces usually don't have sizes). But once you have something in a certain size, style and color, you can be sure that nobody else can buy that from that branch. Hence, each piece is one of a kind. And the designs are pretty, too. That's why I super love that store. The fact that the stuff are really affordable is just a bonus!
So I went out of that store, happy with my first buy that afternoon. After that, I got a nice and simple purple top, a swim suit, and super short white shorts. (I transferred to Trinoma, by the way).
The Kappa Induction was still on-going, so I thought I have enough time to get myself a new pair of Havaianas. Or Dupe (which I think is a lot softer than Havs!). I headed to the All Flipflops outlet, hoping to use my 10% discount from my BDJ planner. Haha. But the ones I like don't come in my size, and the ones that do come in my size aren't comfortable or cute enough. So I went to Landmark instead. Still nothing.
It was already almost 6, and the ceremony was about to be over, so I decided to go back to UP. I then remembered I forgot to bring a bar of soap and that I haven't bought sunblock yet. But then I noticed something.
One paper bag less.
The first I got that day.
The one I liked the most.
I hurriedly went to the nearest cashier to pay for the sunblock and the soap. The lady was super slow and I almost volunteered to do the job for her. But I still have manners. Haha. Then I went back to the flipflops area in Landmark. To All Flipflops. To the stores I visited prior to going to All Flipflops. None. Nada. Zilch.
I went to the concierge and asked if they have a Lost and Found Section. The lady told me that they do. I then filled up a form and she reported it over the phone. She told me they'd just contact me if someone returns it.
It has been three days already. Nobody did.
And also because of that, I got really delayed and ended up taking a cab from Trinoma to Sta. Lucia. Goodbye P200. Since I hate being the cause of the delay, I told the seniors they could go ahead to the resort and I'll just take a cab all the way there. But they love me, so they waited :) Thank God the traffic wasn't that heavy.
The top itself cost a few bucks less than 600, so it's not really a big deal. The thing is that I cannot buy the same thing from that store again, since it doesn't come in sizes, and the only other color they have for that style is dark brown, which isn't as summery as torquoise. And there's no other stock. They only produce one of each kind, remember? The one I got was actually what the mannequin was wearing. She was half-naked when I left.
You know how much I love clothes. I know this is somewhat petty, but just imagine that you lost something you really like and you can relate to me.
Goodbye, love :'(
Good thing I had fun with the seniors that night :) And on the brighter side, at least it wasn't the paper bag containing my new bikini set that got lost/stolen. I would've had nothing to wear that night if that was what I lost.
***Since I used my credit card, and I put my copy of the receipt inside the paper bag, it has my name in it. HAYY MAGUILTY NA ANG HINDI NAGBALIK :( Tntry ko na lang isiping poor person ang nakakuha non at kailangang kailangan niya ng ganon for something. Hayy.
***For being careless (and wasting my parents' money), I punished myself by deleting one item from my list of things to buy (yes, though dad gave me my conscience as my limit--basically, unlimited--I'm still a good girl and I gave myself a quantity quota per kind) and by deducting a certain amount from the limit I set for the corporate clothes.
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
http://www.ateneolaw.ateneo.edu/index.php?p=137
OH. M. G.
wala nga ako kamalaymalay nung unang lumabas na pala. after my super late lunch (buhay bum, buhay bum!), mga 4.30, bumalik ako sa kwarto ko para magpaka-bum further. and then i saw my good friend charles' text message, congratulating me.
just earlier this morning, me and my friend joy co were talking about it. she said she's more geared towards taking an MA in ateneo, while i said i'm 97% sure that i wanna explore life first. i just [rhea]lized in the past few days that there are soooo many things i wanna do and be. and if i go to law school straight ahead, i might not have a chance to do those things in the future anymore. i'm kinda afraid that law school might eat me up. although knowing me, i wouldn't let that happen. i love a balanced life too much to let that happen.
recently, i've been excited with the idea of working. my dad, seeing that i'm now more leaned towards working, even told my mom to go shop for corpo clothes with me. (haha segue, iba pa yan dun sa sinabi niya sakin kahapon na i could shop for other clothes with only my conscience as my limit! o diba, he trusts me. haha! whoot at marami pa ko bibilin bwahahaha). anyway, less than an hour ago, i was almost so sure that that's the plan.
right this very moment, my friend joy co and i are talking about it. like me, she passed unconditionally, too. meaning that we don't have to be interviewed anymore. plus to be fair naman sa amin, hindi naman ito tira-tira lang after matanggal ang mga pumasa at nagconfirm na sa UP Law. Kasi andito pa yung mga ibang LAE passers, like sina Arianne Cerezo.
LIFE TALAGA. mahilig mangonfuse! bakit kasi diba kung kelan set na set ka na for other things, bigla kang bibigyan ng iba. alam mo yun? it's one thing kasi na pumasa and may interview pa. baka yun tamarin na ko. pero iba to eh.
PERO MAY NAISIP AKO. kahit supermegakaduperEXAG nakakainis nga na lagi na lang ako ginugulo ng mga pangyayari (i.e. ang di ko pagpasa sa LAE at ito), narealize kong maganda siya in a way. kasi binibigyan ako ng buhay ng chance na magdecide talaga, na mag-isip talaga. diba? nung di ako natanggap sa dream school ko, marami akong narealize. at tulad ng sinabi ko, magandang opportunity yun for me para mapagisipan kung gusto ko ba talaga ang law.
Gusto ko nga ba? alam ko na yung sagot jan.
Oo. Gustong gusto ko. Pero, tulad nga ng sinabi kong [rhea]lization ko, there are just sooo many things i want to do and be. things other than being a lawyer. Because i don't want it to be my life. I just really want the title and the great things i can accomplish being one. Sabi ko nga, oo, willing akong magspend ng 4 more years for that for extra letters. Haha, one letter per year. tapos yung period sa Atty., pag pumasa na ko ng bar! hahaha!
So diba ayun, mejo may direksyon na buhay ko.
Pero hindi. Kung nung una, binigyan ako ng opportunity na mag-isip dahil nga di ako pumasa sa dream school ko (and thank God i've found the answer!), ngayon naman binibigyan ako ng opportunity na tumuloy pa rin. I mean, kasi kung di ako pumasa, parang left with no choice na talaga ako diba. Work na ito. Pero hindi. May option ako. So mejo hindi nanaman straight direksyon ko. Pero yun nga, i'd rather look at things as opportunities for contemplation.
Hay Lord. Thank you so much for Your blessings :) Please help me make the right decision. Whatever it will be, I know it will be a great one :)
PS. Well hindi ko pa ata nasabing masaya naman ako sa results :) Kahit confusing, masaya pa rin :) Sabi ko nga, di man ako tutuloy makita ko lang na may pinasahan naman ako at na may future pa rin ako sa law.
OH. M. G.
wala nga ako kamalaymalay nung unang lumabas na pala. after my super late lunch (buhay bum, buhay bum!), mga 4.30, bumalik ako sa kwarto ko para magpaka-bum further. and then i saw my good friend charles' text message, congratulating me.
just earlier this morning, me and my friend joy co were talking about it. she said she's more geared towards taking an MA in ateneo, while i said i'm 97% sure that i wanna explore life first. i just [rhea]lized in the past few days that there are soooo many things i wanna do and be. and if i go to law school straight ahead, i might not have a chance to do those things in the future anymore. i'm kinda afraid that law school might eat me up. although knowing me, i wouldn't let that happen. i love a balanced life too much to let that happen.
recently, i've been excited with the idea of working. my dad, seeing that i'm now more leaned towards working, even told my mom to go shop for corpo clothes with me. (haha segue, iba pa yan dun sa sinabi niya sakin kahapon na i could shop for other clothes with only my conscience as my limit! o diba, he trusts me. haha! whoot at marami pa ko bibilin bwahahaha). anyway, less than an hour ago, i was almost so sure that that's the plan.
right this very moment, my friend joy co and i are talking about it. like me, she passed unconditionally, too. meaning that we don't have to be interviewed anymore. plus to be fair naman sa amin, hindi naman ito tira-tira lang after matanggal ang mga pumasa at nagconfirm na sa UP Law. Kasi andito pa yung mga ibang LAE passers, like sina Arianne Cerezo.
LIFE TALAGA. mahilig mangonfuse! bakit kasi diba kung kelan set na set ka na for other things, bigla kang bibigyan ng iba. alam mo yun? it's one thing kasi na pumasa and may interview pa. baka yun tamarin na ko. pero iba to eh.
PERO MAY NAISIP AKO. kahit supermegakaduperEXAG nakakainis nga na lagi na lang ako ginugulo ng mga pangyayari (i.e. ang di ko pagpasa sa LAE at ito), narealize kong maganda siya in a way. kasi binibigyan ako ng buhay ng chance na magdecide talaga, na mag-isip talaga. diba? nung di ako natanggap sa dream school ko, marami akong narealize. at tulad ng sinabi ko, magandang opportunity yun for me para mapagisipan kung gusto ko ba talaga ang law.
Gusto ko nga ba? alam ko na yung sagot jan.
Oo. Gustong gusto ko. Pero, tulad nga ng sinabi kong [rhea]lization ko, there are just sooo many things i want to do and be. things other than being a lawyer. Because i don't want it to be my life. I just really want the title and the great things i can accomplish being one. Sabi ko nga, oo, willing akong magspend ng 4 more years for that for extra letters. Haha, one letter per year. tapos yung period sa Atty., pag pumasa na ko ng bar! hahaha!
So diba ayun, mejo may direksyon na buhay ko.
Pero hindi. Kung nung una, binigyan ako ng opportunity na mag-isip dahil nga di ako pumasa sa dream school ko (and thank God i've found the answer!), ngayon naman binibigyan ako ng opportunity na tumuloy pa rin. I mean, kasi kung di ako pumasa, parang left with no choice na talaga ako diba. Work na ito. Pero hindi. May option ako. So mejo hindi nanaman straight direksyon ko. Pero yun nga, i'd rather look at things as opportunities for contemplation.
Hay Lord. Thank you so much for Your blessings :) Please help me make the right decision. Whatever it will be, I know it will be a great one :)
PS. Well hindi ko pa ata nasabing masaya naman ako sa results :) Kahit confusing, masaya pa rin :) Sabi ko nga, di man ako tutuloy makita ko lang na may pinasahan naman ako at na may future pa rin ako sa law.
Sunday, March 1, 2009
How can you pack forever in a month?
One last month and college would be over (*can't find an appropriate smiley 'cause i'm feeling an awful wide range of emotions*).
Note: no coherence here, just strings of sentences.
*As you might have noticed, I haven't blogged much last month (which just ended yesterday with a bang) because it has been such a busy one for me. So I'm trying to blog now, albeit incoherently.
*Sometime last week, Chesca and I came up with this "crying party" idea. It all started when Ches started being so unusually extra perky and then ended up getting a wee bit too emo reminiscing our freshman days. We were conversing in ym, but I just had to call. Haha. And then I started crying. Haha. Take note: I had a lab exam the following day.
*Every phase of my life had its own ups and downs. But I would say that college has been the best, so far. That's why, just this moment, I [rhea]lized that more than being excited, proud, and happy with the idea that I'm finally going to graduate from college, from UP, nonetheless, I can't help but feel a bit sad. Actually, "sad" doesn't do much justice to how I feel. It's a positive and negative feeling rolled into one, I guess, but maybe it's just that this feeling isn't triggering adrenaline and endorphins. Unlike a lot of kids, I HAVE ALWAYS LOVED SCHOOL. I have never really been the best student in class, but I could say that I have always been a good one. I have an affinity for learning. And studying, as nerdy as it might sound. Haha, you know one of the things I am gonna miss about being a student? Highlighting books, making reviewers, reviewing reviewers, and doing well during "tanungan"with classmates. Haha. So nerdy, noh? But I am actually going to really, really miss those.And the people! I'm gonna miss the people! School's so much easier because you're with people your age.
*I just can't believe I only have one month left. One month to try to squeeze in everything I want to do before graduating, one month to try to rekindle friendships that have not been given much attention to due to busy schedules, and one month to cherish and savor being with the one I love. Don't get me wrong. I'm not going to break up with him after graduating. It's just that it's going to be harder when I'm not in school anymore. I've always liked that we get to see each other almost as often as we want to; that when I need immediate help, he's just a call (and a few minutes) away. Having him and being with him were one of the best blessings I got during my college years.
*At the same time, I feel proud of myself. Sure, I've made a gazillion mistakes along the way, but still, the past 16 years I spent in school weren't so bad. When I was in pre-school, I was overwhelmed with the idea of having to go to school for so many more years. I said I loved school, yes, but hey, as a very young child, who can't help but think that finishing school seems like forever? And now that it's nearly over... well, I still can't believe it's nearly over. My pre-school self would be so proud of her older versions for surpassing all those challenges :)
*This morning, I came up with this idea: I'm gonna document every single day of my last month in school :D Well, not really every activity, but at least a few shots from each day. And! I'll jot down the best parts of each day. And yes, every day shall have a "best" part. And there's no more room for "worsts."
*Here are JUST SOME of the things I want to do before wearing that sablay :)
Note: no coherence here, just strings of sentences.
*As you might have noticed, I haven't blogged much last month (which just ended yesterday with a bang) because it has been such a busy one for me. So I'm trying to blog now, albeit incoherently.
*Sometime last week, Chesca and I came up with this "crying party" idea. It all started when Ches started being so unusually extra perky and then ended up getting a wee bit too emo reminiscing our freshman days. We were conversing in ym, but I just had to call. Haha. And then I started crying. Haha. Take note: I had a lab exam the following day.
*Every phase of my life had its own ups and downs. But I would say that college has been the best, so far. That's why, just this moment, I [rhea]lized that more than being excited, proud, and happy with the idea that I'm finally going to graduate from college, from UP, nonetheless, I can't help but feel a bit sad. Actually, "sad" doesn't do much justice to how I feel. It's a positive and negative feeling rolled into one, I guess, but maybe it's just that this feeling isn't triggering adrenaline and endorphins. Unlike a lot of kids, I HAVE ALWAYS LOVED SCHOOL. I have never really been the best student in class, but I could say that I have always been a good one. I have an affinity for learning. And studying, as nerdy as it might sound. Haha, you know one of the things I am gonna miss about being a student? Highlighting books, making reviewers, reviewing reviewers, and doing well during "tanungan"with classmates. Haha. So nerdy, noh? But I am actually going to really, really miss those.And the people! I'm gonna miss the people! School's so much easier because you're with people your age.
*I just can't believe I only have one month left. One month to try to squeeze in everything I want to do before graduating, one month to try to rekindle friendships that have not been given much attention to due to busy schedules, and one month to cherish and savor being with the one I love. Don't get me wrong. I'm not going to break up with him after graduating. It's just that it's going to be harder when I'm not in school anymore. I've always liked that we get to see each other almost as often as we want to; that when I need immediate help, he's just a call (and a few minutes) away. Having him and being with him were one of the best blessings I got during my college years.
*At the same time, I feel proud of myself. Sure, I've made a gazillion mistakes along the way, but still, the past 16 years I spent in school weren't so bad. When I was in pre-school, I was overwhelmed with the idea of having to go to school for so many more years. I said I loved school, yes, but hey, as a very young child, who can't help but think that finishing school seems like forever? And now that it's nearly over... well, I still can't believe it's nearly over. My pre-school self would be so proud of her older versions for surpassing all those challenges :)
*This morning, I came up with this idea: I'm gonna document every single day of my last month in school :D Well, not really every activity, but at least a few shots from each day. And! I'll jot down the best parts of each day. And yes, every day shall have a "best" part. And there's no more room for "worsts."
*Here are JUST SOME of the things I want to do before wearing that sablay :)
- stay overnight at the University hotel! :)
- eat breakfast at sunken garden with fellow seniors, reminisce our earlier days together, cry, and laugh.
- have a meaningful conversation with each of the people I look up to over coffee at Cordillera Coffee or Choc Kiss or Figaro (just because it feels a lot more "UP" if the conversation is in Diliman).
- spend a day taking pictures around the campus with friends.
- walk (very slowly!) around the campus at night, under the stars, with people I love. one at a time :)
- eat isaw with the POPS we're gonna leave behind. or okay, maybe not necessarily isaw. but I just want really want more happy memories with them before I leave. i know i don't tambay as much these days (because I'm spending most of my time left with jamo) but i really want to spend time with these kids. haha. they're not even kids. most are just my age (or even older). but yeah, imma miss them. they might not know it, but they made me discover a lot of things about myself and I am really thankful.
- join a build with UPGK! i miss gawad kalinga soo much.
*My next post would be pictures from February! :) And I guess, after I take that last exam or pass that last requirement, I'm going to post a collection of pictures from my entire college life :)
How can you pack forever in a month?
Well, I guess you could start by using time really wisely.
No more room for doing the unnecessary.
Because we're talking of the end of a "great run" (Hernandez, 2009) here, honey :)
---
According to social psychology, we tend to overestimate our future feelings. So now, I comfort myself with the idea that it isn't going to be so sad and hard when I do leave behind everything that was good about college. Because hey, it's also the beginning of another great run :) And I don't even have to leave everything behind--some I can still carry with me, and for the others, I can always go back and visit UP. Or, I can be a student again :p We'll see.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Hello, other options :)
Passing the UP Law Aptitude Exam would have made things easier for me: it would have been the convenient choice to enroll in the UP College of Law and give my best shot as a student.
I have mentioned a number of times here in my blog that there are a lot of other things I want to do, and that I'm not even sure if law really is for me. And now that I know I'm not part of the bright 238 people who made it (out of what, 5000? 6000?), the question of whether I really want Law is all the more glaring. Without the prestige of my beloved University, do I still want it? Ateneo Law and UP Law, for example, are basically both Law schools. However, why is it that I don't feel the same passion for the former as compared to the latter? Does this mean, then, that it isn't really law that I want but the institution itself? But then again, for my option of taking postgraduate studies in psychology, Ateneo seems pretty much okay. So the point is... well, I don't want to jump into conclusions of what I really want. Because as of now, this whole not-passing-the-LAE thing is seriously challenging what I want to do. And it's my future that's at stake here, so that's a big deal.
I cried. I cried without really being sure of the reason why. The one thing that came to mind was the constant reassurance of the people around me that they know I'd surely pass. People, do your friends a favor and don't do that. It pressured me a lot, y'know. Even if on my own, I wasn't that sure of my feelings towards law school, the fact that everyone was expecting I'd surely pass made it hard for me to accept that I didn't. Pride kicked in.
So pride kicked in. But I didn't let it consume me. And I guess that was the defining moment. The late Randy Pausch, author of the bestseller The Last Lecture, once said that "we cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand." And true enough, I couldn't change the fact that I didn't pass my dream school, but then I believe I get to define my character by how I choose to respond to that situation.
For the record, I really don't do well in entrance exams: in Manila Science, though admitted, I was not part of any of the top three sections; in UP, though eventually admitted to my first choice, I was first DPWS (degree program with slots). You might be surprised by the latter 'cause I never really shared it in public *cough*pride*cough*. So I wasn't so surprised I didn't pass (notice my avoidance of using "I failed"). I expected it, but the people around me didn't, and I guess that's the reason for the initial "my-world's-falling-apart" feeling. But anyway, mediocre as I have been in admission tests, I would like to believe that I made up for it when I was already in the said institutions. In Manila Science for example, in the course of the four years, I did better than some of those who were initially placed in the top three sections. And even if I was not accepted to Psych right away, I more than compensated for that by performing well in my acads and by now being a candidate for cum laude (which I may or may not achieve, but that's already beside the point). I talk about these things not to boast. Rather, I guess these just serve as reminders for me not to think lowly of myself; that I am a fighter and that if I just be given the opportunity, I could actually meet the demands and do well.
It still pains me in a way. I still haven't had a really good cry. I will, in the privacy of my own room back in Laguna. I can't wait. I just want to really let it out.
But well, hello other options! :)
Sometime this week I'll visit Prof. Rosel at the OCG. I really need some guidance because right now there are just so many to choose from. And the choice won't be convenient, unlike if I passed the LAE. But the harder it is to make a choice, the greater the mental faculty to employ, and the more reasonable the judgment will be. UP Law would have been a very convenient choice. But I'm graduating and I've always had the convenient choices. It's time to grow up and move out of my comfort zone :) What do I really want in life? Truth be told, I still want to get admitted to UP Law, but only because it would make the decision-making process a lot easier for me, and yeah, it would be good for my pride, too. But I have so many years ahead of me. I guess I have to undergo through this hard process. I want to know what I really want. So help me God.
I have mentioned a number of times here in my blog that there are a lot of other things I want to do, and that I'm not even sure if law really is for me. And now that I know I'm not part of the bright 238 people who made it (out of what, 5000? 6000?), the question of whether I really want Law is all the more glaring. Without the prestige of my beloved University, do I still want it? Ateneo Law and UP Law, for example, are basically both Law schools. However, why is it that I don't feel the same passion for the former as compared to the latter? Does this mean, then, that it isn't really law that I want but the institution itself? But then again, for my option of taking postgraduate studies in psychology, Ateneo seems pretty much okay. So the point is... well, I don't want to jump into conclusions of what I really want. Because as of now, this whole not-passing-the-LAE thing is seriously challenging what I want to do. And it's my future that's at stake here, so that's a big deal.
I cried. I cried without really being sure of the reason why. The one thing that came to mind was the constant reassurance of the people around me that they know I'd surely pass. People, do your friends a favor and don't do that. It pressured me a lot, y'know. Even if on my own, I wasn't that sure of my feelings towards law school, the fact that everyone was expecting I'd surely pass made it hard for me to accept that I didn't. Pride kicked in.
So pride kicked in. But I didn't let it consume me. And I guess that was the defining moment. The late Randy Pausch, author of the bestseller The Last Lecture, once said that "we cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand." And true enough, I couldn't change the fact that I didn't pass my dream school, but then I believe I get to define my character by how I choose to respond to that situation.
For the record, I really don't do well in entrance exams: in Manila Science, though admitted, I was not part of any of the top three sections; in UP, though eventually admitted to my first choice, I was first DPWS (degree program with slots). You might be surprised by the latter 'cause I never really shared it in public *cough*pride*cough*. So I wasn't so surprised I didn't pass (notice my avoidance of using "I failed"). I expected it, but the people around me didn't, and I guess that's the reason for the initial "my-world's-falling-apart" feeling. But anyway, mediocre as I have been in admission tests, I would like to believe that I made up for it when I was already in the said institutions. In Manila Science for example, in the course of the four years, I did better than some of those who were initially placed in the top three sections. And even if I was not accepted to Psych right away, I more than compensated for that by performing well in my acads and by now being a candidate for cum laude (which I may or may not achieve, but that's already beside the point). I talk about these things not to boast. Rather, I guess these just serve as reminders for me not to think lowly of myself; that I am a fighter and that if I just be given the opportunity, I could actually meet the demands and do well.
It still pains me in a way. I still haven't had a really good cry. I will, in the privacy of my own room back in Laguna. I can't wait. I just want to really let it out.
But well, hello other options! :)
Sometime this week I'll visit Prof. Rosel at the OCG. I really need some guidance because right now there are just so many to choose from. And the choice won't be convenient, unlike if I passed the LAE. But the harder it is to make a choice, the greater the mental faculty to employ, and the more reasonable the judgment will be. UP Law would have been a very convenient choice. But I'm graduating and I've always had the convenient choices. It's time to grow up and move out of my comfort zone :) What do I really want in life? Truth be told, I still want to get admitted to UP Law, but only because it would make the decision-making process a lot easier for me, and yeah, it would be good for my pride, too. But I have so many years ahead of me. I guess I have to undergo through this hard process. I want to know what I really want. So help me God.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)