Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Four People, Four Open Letters

Here are just four (of the many) types of people any girl will be lucky to have around!

The Guy Best Friend. Ultimate Giver of GPOV. (Guys’ Point of View)

To Charles:

For keeping me sane and trying your best to make me feel good about myself, thanks. I appreciate it. So much. Soooo much. You know what I mean. You’re one of the very few people who I can tell almost everything to.

I’ll always be your little girl. And you’ll always be my kuya. Through debates, crushes, secrets, and states of paranoia… we’ve seen each other through. Or at least you have seen me through.

For that warm, fuzzy, brotherly love <3>

The Ate. More experienced, she always has great advice. And lots of kwento to go with those!

To Mommy Abii:

You’re one of those who I rarely get to be with yet continue to be an influential person in and an important part of my life. I enjoyed our dinner date last night J I do hope we’ll still keep in touch even if we’re both busy with our own careers many years from now.

We’re different in a number of ways yet we’re similar, too. Isn’t it amazing how a conversation in one bus ride to a province paved the way to our friendship? I’ll never forget that. And you, you will always be someone I look up to- a great woman with so much passion for life and for the people she loves, with an ambition and the ability to reach her dreams… You’re a wonderful role model. A beautiful one at that. It’s good to

know you’re having fun.

Hope to see you again sometime!

The Girl Best Friend. Sharing Your Own Brand of Sass Without Being an Evil Twin.

To Paola:

Too bad our date today was postponed L I soooooooo miss my best friend! But anyways, I understand. J I wanna see you soon! I miss you so much girl!

You know, it amazes me how we still consider each other important in each others’ lives even if we were able to get through half our college life without much conversation, with barely seeing one another… I mean, a lot of things happened to me and to you that the other wasn’t aware of. And there are still so much stories to tell, right? Albeit the lack of togetherness our friendship is still intact. I don’t even deem this friendship as “weaker” compared to what it was like in high school. Sure, I miss being with you and the barkada. I remember how it was hard (like I could just die) for me not to get to talk to you for one school day. I mean, well, my life was right out of the boob tube then, you know what I mean. Literally so much drama, so little time.

We do try to find a common time. Trying is good enough. We will meet sometime soon, I know. The mere fact that our friendship is alive despite the not-seeing-each-other, rarely-talking-to-each-other part says something in itself. With that, I can see that this is not just one of those friendships that come and go. This one’s gonna last. J

The Epitome of Irony. Can’t Live With Him, Can’t Live Without Him.

And I need not mention your name:

Hey you J I’m wearing your jacket right now. I’m never gonna give it back to you. It’s mine now. Miiiiiine! Haha. I kid.

You know, it befuddles me how we’re now this close after the n fights we had- after all those long hate text messages, those tears, those heavy feelings… And until now you still give me reason to get mad or something. I hate you for that. Argh. And yet I don’t know what hit me, why I still keep you around. Well perhaps it could be because of your many occupations in my life. Need I enumerate? (side note: ok, just now, as in just this moment while I’m typing this, I’m kinda irritated with you again. Hay nako. You really don’t see why I’m alarmed sometimes, noh? Haaaay nako talaga. Argh.) Anyways, fine… I’ll just start my enumeration:

  • Taga-dala ng gamit
  • Rant bin
  • Instant companion when I need to run an errand for any of my orgs
  • Punching bag
  • Pillow
  • Taga-pagpaalis sa pusa, aso, etc.
  • Body guard
  • Stuffed toy

Hehehe… I still am not sure where we’ll go. In time we’ll figure out, I suppose.

Thursday, August 9, 2007

Take Five. (Oh no, make that six).

WARNING: Incoherence ahead.

“While happiness is the end of human life, it is best attained by not directly aiming at it.”
- a quote from H.L.A. Gray’s The Concept of Law
How true. And I guess I’ll leave it be. Perhaps as some sort of a reminder to people who are constantly striving to be happy.

And if you would ask me of my current emotional state, happiness isn’t exactly what’s permeating my senses. Happiness, in psych terms, is subjective well-being. And I, being in oblivion of what it is to be truly happy, cannot employ the term.

Don’t get me wrong though. Things are swell. Actually, on one side of the coin I can say that things are more than swell. But perhaps more than expected is the more apposite phrase. On the other side, things aren’t what I expected. At all. (Girl, get a grip. And I thought you want to be surprised?)

Fixation. Perhaps I am fixated to some notions that I fail to see other things. Sorry for being vague, but alas this being my public blog, that’s the closest to specificity that I can write.

Fears and doubts. They have been occupying my thoughts. Right now one could say I’m the opposite of hedonistic. But perhaps it might as well be attributed to self-preservation. Kuya Rob gave me an advice, which I found to be a beautiful paradox: to commit to something is to set one’s self free. I still haven’t fully comprehended what he meant by that. But it’s one thing I would ponder upon. But not now, not just yet.

En panne. Translated in English, it means out of order.

This girl needs some serious reassessment of what she wants, what she holds true, what she believes in, what she’ll argue for.


What to do? What to do? What not to do?

Missed. Missing. Ms.

I missed my oral exam on my Philosophy of Law class, hence I’m bound to read about 15 readings for Saturday! 12 more to go!

I am missing a lot of things. I miss reading a good book. The rain reminds me of days back in high school when I could afford lying comfortably in bed while reading a good book and finding comfort in hearing the rainfall. I used to buy new books every now and then, then. I miss having a crush. Haha. Pwede bang hanggang ganung level na lang, ha? Mas exciting yun eh. Haha. I miss McDo UN Avenue and the Saturday basketball games of our classmates against other sections, where the II-Edison and III-Mendel boys almost always win. I miss Paola. We’ll see each other next Wednesday, though. I hope that doesn’t get cancelled due to bad weather or whatnot. I miss my best friend, the one girl I always ran to back in high school. I miss old people… perhaps some things will remain unsettled, but I think I’m cool with that… I miss the Friday strolls at the mall that my friend Danica and I used to regularly do after class, and our being competitive against our other friend Steeven in Physics class. Haha! I miss Masci, I guess. In some terms life is way better now in UP, though.

Ms. This miss has lots of room for improvement. Just you wait and see.  I will perk up genuinely sometime… :) I’m just not done yet (re)building my cool.

I wanna be a certified rock badger!

“Rock badgers: they are not strong either, but they make their homes among the rocks.”
- Proverbs 30:26

I got sidetracked. I’ll try to pave my way home back to The Rock :)

I’ve a new mantra:

“Let life keep surprising you, and keep surprising life back” -rhealeth ramos

Friday, August 3, 2007

makes my heart melt <3

this kid. she's just so adorable. i bet she makes you heart melt, too :)

i woke up today with a refreshing feeling. looked out at the window with the warm morning sun caressing my skin.. it was nice :) then i swept the floor. seeing it sparkling white is now a simple joy :)

it's good to know that simple things still make my heart melt :)
[matagal tagal din kasi siyang naging numb. hehe]